An Unexpected Gift

The best gift I have ever received was not pulled out from under the Christmas tree or wrapped in pretty paper with a bow for my birthday.  The best gift I ever received was a selfless act of love and kindness, demonstrated to me by a most unsuspecting person, my husband’s ex-wife.

When Chris and I first met, he had been divorced for about a year and his son, Mitchell, was about a year and a half old.  One weekend, after Chris and I got engaged we drove to North Carolina to bring Mitchell back to TN for the summer.  Before we left, Mitchell’s mom, Deana, congratulated us and then she said to me, “I won’t ever have a problem with you as long as you treat my son like he is your own.”  Having grown up with divorced parents and more than one set of step-parents, it was important to me, from the start, that Mitchell never felt like he was competing with me for his Dad’s attention or like he ever felt like a visitor when he came to stay with us.  Even so, her request felt a bit intimidating.  Over the next 15 or so years, I tried my hardest to do what she had asked.  At times, I felt like I fell short of her request.  Some days, I worried that I wasn’t doing a good enough job.

In March of 2017, Mitchell married his wife Courtney.  A few months before the wedding, Mitchell and Courtney surprised me and flew me to Texas for Courtney’s wedding shower.  If it was okay with me, they said, I would be staying with Mitchell’s mom.  This felt kind of cool and weird, all at the same time but I figured “why not?”

The night before I flew back to TN, Deana and I sat up and kind of reminisced about Mitchell growing up.  She said, “Do you remember what I told you after you and Chris got engaged?”  I laughed and nodded.

Then, she told me that she wanted to make appointments for us to get our hair done together on the day of the wedding and that even though she knew I didn’t like to dance, she had talked to Mitchell and she wanted to share the Mother/Son dance with me.  She insisted.  I was floored.  It was one of the most selfless things anyone has ever offered me.  With that one gesture, she laid to rest any doubts I had about doing a good enough job with her son.  Not that I was perfect, but that I did my very best.  What she offered that day was a reminder of God’s love for me.  That even though I fail and don’t do things perfectly, He still offers me his best.

I have never liked to dance.  But on March 11, 2017 that all changed for a few brief minutes as shared I a Mother/Son dance with my stepson. A grace filled gift, to me, from his mother.

Lord, thank you that the light of Your love can shine through the selfless love of others.  Amen